How I Woke Up
I’m not exactly sure why, but it seems that Dating was the topic of choice this morning in the blogosphere (um… sorry if I just may you taste bile by using that word). Dating politically, to be more specific. Or, perhaps it would be more correct to call it “dating philosophically”. What ever it is, it makes me so glad to be married to the AstroWife.
I took a stab at the chronology. It appears that this article in the New York Times started it all sometime yesterday.
We’ve all been there. Or some of us have. Anyone who cares about books has at some point confronted the Pushkin problem: when a missed — or misguided — literary reference makes it chillingly clear that a romance is going nowhere fast. At least since Dante’s Paolo and Francesca fell in love over tales of Lancelot, literary taste has been a good shorthand for gauging compatibility.
Um… right. That brought a response from one of the more (ahem) vocal feminist bloggers.
I have so been here. Yes, I judge people by their literary choices. Do you list The Da Vinci Code as one of your favorite books on Facebook? Talk about how great Ayn Rand is? Read John Grisham novels somewhere other than on an airplane or the beach? Think that God is super smart for having written the Bible? Even worse, say that you don’t like to read? I’m running in the other direction (especially when it comes to dating you).
Okay then. No one to the right of Tom Hayden need apply.
With the left side of the blogosphere (there’s that word again) heard from, the right side got into the act.
I thought it might be fun to talk to some conservative women to find out some of their best and worst dating stories, to see if there’s a difference between dating conservative and liberal men, and just to get a little of the dating advice that seems to do so well on CG.
So, I interviewed some of my conservative female friends who blog, especially the ones I knew had some great dating stories, and you’re about to get an opportunity to read what they had to say.
The consensus (at least for five of the six interviewed) was that although they all have dated liberals in the past, they are really careful about doing that again. That, and they don’t care for guys who come off as arrogantly overconfident. (Duh!). From Sharon Soon:
Guys tend to think women like these macho tough guys and they have to be sort of like masculine, powerful, and flawless. They put on this tough guy act and in all honesty, girls, make fun of guys for that. We can see right through it. We know that it’s just a put on and a joke.
Dawn Eden had (by far) the most interesting and intelligent things to say.
…My experience with liberals is that superficially, they may be more fun to be around. They’re a bit looser and more relaxed. They make an effort to be more sensitive, but the sensitivity only goes so far. It’s easy for a man to keep this illusion of being a great, sensitive romantic if he knows he’s just going to sleep with you and then say good-bye. Anybody can be Mr. Love God for one night or one week or one month.
When I became conservative, which coincided with my becoming a Christian, I realized that even though there were things I liked sentimentally about liberal men, I wanted somebody who shared my values. Conservatives might not always be so easy to get along with at first, but I thought it was worth my time to get to know men who were compatible with me and would eventually warm up.
Michelle Malkin picked up on the theme and links to a feature that gives the man’s POV.
[F]or those of you who are single and looking for politically compatible love, John Hawkins’ latest feature on conservative women and dating is an entertaining and useful read.
Finally, Ann Althouse speaks out of this most important issue of the day, clobbering both the original NYT article and the Right Wing News Interviews.
Ugh. This is almost as annoying as this essay the other day in the NYT — it’s now #1 on their most-emailed list — about these literary types who abhor love from people who don’t know all the authors or don’t like the right books:
Then I had my morning coffee, woke up, and was thankful for my wife. In that order.